13 Subtle Behaviors That Instantly Kill Your Credibility—Are You Guilty of These Condescending Moves?
Related: 15 Things Men Say That Get on Women’s Nerves
5. Saying you “actually” like an idea
This is the subtle way of saying, “Wow! You did something smart, and I never expected that from you!” Many of us have received a critical email from a condescending boss that lists all the things you did wrong, and then ends with, “but I actually thought this thought was great.” This kind of backhanded compliment can feel worse than getting no praise at all. If you offer a solution to a problem in a meeting, and someone says, “Hey, that’s actually a pretty good idea,” it sounds as if they’re surprised by your intelligent contribution, and they generally expect little of you. If you “actually” like something, you can just say you like it.
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