How to find strength and confidence at your most vulnerable moments


Our mindset is our first line of defense when it comes to dealing with life’s ups and downs. The good news is that feeling stronger, calmer and more self-assured are all abilities we can develop , not personality traits that we have to be born with.

Being kind to yourself.

Self-compassion is about being category to ourselves no matter what is going on in our lives. It’s knowing that kindness towards my best friend, family or works brings out the best in them- and kindness to ourselves brings out the most wonderful in us, very. It’s acknowledging that we are all simply human, shortcoming and imperfect, but adorable and worthwhile. When life isn’t going so well, self-compassion is like a cushion. It helps us to bounce and not break.

Being kind to yourself can extend every expanse of their own lives. I’ll often tell my clients to ask themselves’ How can I establish myself kindness today ?’ From going 8 hours sleep, to brushing your teeth with a naturally caused toothpaste like Zendium, to creating some lily-white opening in your journal- keep coming back to what is kindest for you and your organization. And according to Dr. David Hamilton, key experts on kindness, being manner to ourselves can even boost our immune systems and natural defences.

Be your own best friend.

To practise this in your daily life, step into the shoes of your friend. Imagine what they would say about what you’re going through right now. What kind words would they have for you? How might they reframe things? Keep coming back to this as you go through your epoch. More and more, it will become automatic for you to speak to yourself as you are able to a friend.

Touch omission.

Our know-how of life is the result of the gist we give to things. In our culture, we tend to think of things in black and white. Pass or miscarry. Good or bad. Right or wrong. Perfect or a catastrophe. This ignores the fact that the truth often lies in the subtleties of gray-haired. It too doesn’t takes into consideration that these labels do not belong on a human being. A human being cannot be a failure. You are a process of learning, ripening and constantly evolving all the time.

Reframe it.

When you experience a disappointment; conversion the means that you be provided to it. Lose the labels. When you do this, a job loss becomes a brand-new opportunity, a fall out with a friend becomes a chance to learn about bounds, examining a’ no’ from an audition or job interview becomes a chance to get valuable intelligence so you can improve for next time. Changing the signify you give to things means you can turn dislocations into breakthroughs, wounds into prudence and los into feedback. This boosts our exemption when it comes to challenges and is our first line of defense when it comes to the ups and downs of life.

Bear ambiguity.

As the old saying get, the only thing that is certain, is that life is uncertain. Not exactly what we want to hear, especially when we like things a certain way, love to feel in control and detest annoying astounds or the unknown. What if you didn’t have to be in control? What if you could relax and trust that nothing was in control, but that was ok? Instead, you could believe that you have riches, strongs, wise and inner cleverness that you can call on when you need them. Give yourself some more credit.

You’ve got this.

You have a 100% track record of hold hesitations in the past. What are some challenges you’ve handled? Maybe you’ve moved to a new city, bootstrapped a start-up business or steered a capital city without knowing the language. Or perhaps you’ve birthed a insignificant human, mended a broken heart or endured your difficult childhood. You have already overcome so many difficulties and indecisions. When we’re researched, we discover strengths within us we didn’t know we had. We have a natural potential inside us, waiting to be tapped. All of your predecessors subsisted and directed fantastic challenges, and you are the end result. You have 100% got this.

Courage, overconfidence

It’s easy to look at apparently confident women and assume they have it all figured out. But formerly we burrow deeper, we discover that what looks like confidence is, in fact, mettle. Adele has reportedly been so nervous before conducts that she projectile regurgitations. Michelle Obama struggles with imposter disorder. Inspirational speaker Mel Robbins had a panic attack on stage during her 2011 TED talk.

You’re ordinary.

If you feel scared or restless about taking a big step in your life, guess what? It’s normal. Fear, anxiety, imposter syndrome and not feeling good enough are practically universal human experiences. Instead of trouncing yourself up about your lack of confidence, or worse, nursing yourself back from making a change because you’re waiting to feel confident, feel the nervousnes and do it anyway. Confidence comes from giving things a try and learning that we can survive and even thrive outside of our comfort zone. When we’re in a stressful or anxiety-provoking situation, such as giving a introduction, the supportive nervous system is activated causing a rush of adrenaline, a race heart and butterflies in our belly as their own bodies does ready to run away or battle what it perceives as a threat.

But facing our panics can help us to calm this response. Sometimes announced’ showing regiman ‘, a type of cognitive behavioural care, when you purposefully put yourself into a situation that triggers fear- and you exist – your nervous system gradually learns that the situation isn’t in fact risky. When we’re stressed or desirous we can also get a dry mouth. Most regular toothpastes are made with SLS, a foaming operator which can aggravate a dry speak feeling. Zendium is different- it’s a SLS-free toothpaste that offers natural armour and works in harmony with your body , not against it.

And remember, for those of us with empathy, and a pulse, we’re going to have to live with some suspicion. But we move through the panic and find confidence at the other side.


Chloe Brotheridge is a hypnotherapist and coach at She’s the author of The Anxiety Solution and ‘Brave New Girl’.


Zendium toothpaste protects your speak in a kinder way and is designed to strengthen your lip- not fight against it. Its pioneering formula contains natural antibacterial enzymes and proteins to boost your mouth’s most powerful defence system: the oral microbiome. Zendium is kind by design. Instead of using draconian compounds, Zendium utilizes ingredients that have a prebiotic benefit and is free from SLS foaming agent concluding it is ideal for even the most delicate mouths.


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