MAGA Showdown Explodes Online: Greene vs. Loomer—Who’s Really Winning the Battle for America’s Attention?

Well, if you thought the political arena was a place of decorum and calm, think again—because the rancor between Very Important White House Aide Laura Loomer and Congresswoman Marjorie Taylor Greene is something else entirely. It’s like watching a bizarre tug-of-war unfolding not over policies or plans, but personalities and power plays that feel equal parts soap opera and street fight. And honestly, who needs to know the nitty-gritty of what kicked off this public spat? Sometimes, it’s just the spectacle that’s the main event. Can you imagine the fitness of their egos—bulging muscles of narcissism flexing against each other until one finally taps out? The sharp-tongued volleys, accusations flying like jabs in a heavyweight bout, make you wonder if politics has become a bizarre cardio session for the soul—exhausting and eyebrow-raising all at once. So, as we dive into this drama, keep your guard up and your sense of humor intact because this clash of “titans” might just be the most intense workout your political funny bone has seen in a while. LEARN MORE

Good Lord, there seems to be fever in the funk house now. Very Important White House Aide Laura Loomer and Very Important Congressperson Marjorie Taylor Greene seem to have had something of a falling-out. Over what, I have no idea, and I couldn’t care less. (Could you?) But Loomer has achieved escape velocity and is still throttling up. From her Xwitter account:

Marjorie Traitor Greene @RepMTG is a home wrecker. Her narcissistic personality disorder has made her believe that she is President Trump’s successor. She truly believes that her word has more weight than Donald Trump’s, and her narcissism has rotted her brain like a cancer. It’s now making her rip our country apart. This is a woman who allowed her sexual impulses to tear her family apart. She wants to now tear our country apart to try to steal Trump’s movement away from him. Don’t let this home wrecker become a country wrecker. Trump would benefit from putting her in her place and reminding this rabid dog who is the boss and the real leader of MAGA. It’s Trump, not MTG. It’s called the Trump administration. Not the Hump administration. Go find a chair to hump like the dog in heat you’ve always been, @mtgreenee

You will never take over Trump’s movement. You will not succeed in dividing his base your narcissistic witch. We won’t let the home wrecker become a country wrecker. We will destroy you before we ever allow you to try to ruin the MAGA movement the same way you ruined your family.

And not only that, but…

The lying fake Christian whore @mtgreenee is lying about me again. She is so jealous that she is fading into irrelevancy after she couldn’t secure an endorsement for her Senate campaign. She claims I have lied about her and smeared her. I posted receipts for everything I said. She refuses to address those receipts. She has provided no evidence of her claims about me that she made from her congressional account, an abuse of power and certainly an ethics violation. She also claims she is one of Trump’s “most loyal supporters”. Here she is bashing Trump recently. Does this look like loyalty to you? Accusing Trump of not keeping his campaign promises and lying, saying he got us into WW3? She is one dumb bitch. Probably the dumbest bitch in Congress, and definitely not loyal. Just ask her ex husband Perry!

Let us accept as unimpeachable fact that neither of these two people should be in their current jobs and that it’s six, two, and even that at least one of them should not be allowed out in public without a minder. However, MTG got where she is because almost 244,000 citizens living in Georgia’s 14th congressional district decided—God alone knows how—that she belongs in the United States Congress. Laura Loomer has her job because she’d been publicly crazy long enough to have drawn the attention of El Caudillo del Mar-a-Lago. So as painful as this is for me to admit, if I have to take a side in this Iran–Iraq War of marginal personalities, I’m with the harpy from Georgia.

The larger lesson, of course, is that there is nothing remotely redeemable or of actual benefit to the nation to be found in the MAGA cult. From its Dear Leader down through its congressional replicants, all the way down to the endlessly reprogrammable universe of suckers—to paraphrase the estimable Mr. Electro—on which all of this depends. The prion disease has reached its full-blown pandemic stage. And actually important people who run things like colleges and television networks are hiding in their castles, throwing money out the windows, while the insatiable disease consumes everything around it.

Now they knew that it was the Red Death itself that had come in the night. One by one the dancers fell, and each died as he fell. And the fires died. And the clock stopped. And darkness and decay and the Red Death ruled forever over all.

–Edgar Allan Poe, 1842