Men's Lifestyle July 2, 2026 0 Comments

Texas Schools Just Got Hit with a Sneaky Christian Nationalism Injection—Here’s What They’re Not Telling You!

Welcome to the wild, twisted experiment we call American democracy — where states morph into their own quirky laboratories, cooking up policies that sometimes make you question reality itself. This week, we’re diving deep into Texas’ ambitious blueprint to shove the entire Old Testament down the throats of millions of public school kids — and not just snippets, but every single word, “in its entirety.” Imagine recess games featuring apocalyptic Jesus; sex-ed lessons inspired by Lot’s wife. Are we educating or reenacting biblical epics? Meanwhile, Wisconsin wrestles with a once-beloved environmental program now caught in partisan quicksand, threatening the outdoor culture that folks cherish. And high above it all, the chaos of election meddling sprawls, courtesy of the ultimate political disruptor from Mar-A-Lago, stirring distrust like a pro. To top it off, Oklahoma’s jail system is slipping on sci-fi gloves aimed at deescalation—but hey, what could possibly go wrong with taser-equipped mitts? Buckle up, because this—it’s your democracy, rough and ready. Ready to see how deep the rabbit hole goes? LEARN MORE

5 min read

This Week in the Laboratories of Democracy

(Permanent Musical Accompaniment to This Post)

Being our semi-regular weekly survey of what’s goin’ down in the several states where, as we know, the real work of governmentin’ gets done, and where the sign on the window says lonely.

We begin in Texas, where the Old Testament is a testament to the state’s Crazy. From CNN:

The plan will impact more than 5 million public school students, as Texas emerges as a leader in a national conservative effort to infuse Christian teachings into American classrooms. Multiple titles will be mandated for each grade, and each one must be read “in its entirety.”

… While it is not unusual for states to suggest book titles for schools, Texas may be the first to prescribe a literary canon for every public school student, two experts told The Associated Press.

Just a guess here, but I suspect Leviticus will be studied far more in Texas than, say, the 25th chapter of the Gospel of Matthew. Children will play fun games at recess about Jesus the Disemboweler drawn from John’s apocalypse. Sex Ed will consider the lessons to be drawn from Lot’s wife.

The new list of required titles will include a picture-book adaptation of the David and Goliath story for elementary students and Bible passages about Adam and Eve for older students, among other references, according to a proposed list online. It will also heavily emphasize classic literature and historic American texts such as Abraham Lincoln’s “The Gettysburg Address.”

Again, I don’t like the chances of, say, Frederick Douglass making the cut here. And the attempt to dragoon poor Abe into this mess, despite his brilliant use of Scripture in his rhetoric, is abominable on its face. And here comes the cat bursting from the bag.

At the same meeting Friday, the school board also approved a rewrite of the state’s social studies curriculum, focusing more on Texas and U.S. history and deemphasizing some teachings about global history and cultures. The change will eliminate a sixth grade “World Cultures” course and significantly expand lessons on communism.

I’m not sure the floodgates will ever close again

We move on up to Wisconsin, which has managed to keep pristine what is meant to be pristine through a program called the Knowles-Nelson Stewardship program. (The “Nelson” in the program is the late Senator Gaylord Nelson, who is practically a saint in the Wisconsin environmental community. I mean, the man founded Earth Day.) Well, the program is about to expire, and the Republicans in the legislature are not enthusiastic about renewing it. From WisPolitics:

Democratic Leader Dianne Hesselbein, Senator Sarah Keyeski, and Representative Jenna Jacobson addressed the long-term impacts on Wisconsin’s outdoor culture and industry, underscoring the significance of a Democratic trifecta to Wisconsinites’ desire to see the program continue.

Knowles-Nelson is beloved in the state. It has been vital to Wisconsin’s recreational and tourist economies. But the state government is split now, and the Republican legislature is throwing sand in the gears of the program’s renewal. From Spectrum News 1:

At Governor Knowles State Forest in Grantsburg, Charly Ray, a 25th District State Senate candidate, discussed some of the immediate impacts that would be felt following the program’s expiration. He said that funding for fish hatcheries is crucial for sustaining the Northwoods’ economy, which relies on hunting and fishing. “I know Governor Knowles would be furious to see what his Republican Party has become. Republicans are standing between Wisconsin voters and the Knowles-Nelson Stewardship program, a program that 93% of people in the state approve of,” Ray said in a release.

Rep. Jenna Jacobson, D-Oregon, said without the funding program in place, the Wisconsin culture of camping trips and hiking will be “harmed.” “We used to have Republicans who believed that it was worth coming together to protect the outdoor heritage that many Wisconsinites treasure,” Jacobson told reporters. “Bipartisanship is built into the very title of the program, and yet it’s clear that it has changed.”

A measure to renew the program for two years failed in the state senate six months ago. And the entire issue seems stalled at the moment.

And we now ascend to the view from 30,000 feet, where we find The New York Times looking down at all the ways El Caudillo del Mar-A-Lago is screwing around with elections in the states.

Many of [Trump’s] efforts have been blocked by courts, stymied by the Constitution, or stopped in Congress. But the relentless assault by the president on the electoral process—both administratively and rhetorically—is likely to sow doubt and lay groundwork for extensive challenges to election results. Agencies and officials across the federal government have, at the direction of Mr. Trump, undertaken dozens of actions grounded in novel strategies and aimed at insulating Republicans from potential losses in November.

“The point of so much of this campaign is not actually to change policy because they know they don’t actually have the authority to change policy,” said Sean Morales-Doyle, director of the Brennan Center’s Voting Rights and Elections Program. “It’s to inject distrust and confusion into our elections, both to discourage people from participating and to lay the groundwork for calling elections into question after the fact.”

It has also sought to target ordinary citizens. In April, the Justice Department issued a federal grand jury subpoena demanding the identities of every person who worked on the 2020 election in Fulton County, Ga. The county’s motion to block the subpoena characterized it as intended “to target, harass and punish the president’s perceived political opponents.” The effort remains tied up in the courts.

To paraphrase Mr. Joyce, ratfcking is general, all over America.

And we conclude, as is our custom, in the great state of Oklahoma, whence Blog Official Cave Art Critic Friedman of the Algarve brings us a story from a couple years back about law-enforcement technology. From News4 in Oklahoma City:

The Oklahoma County Jail is rolling out new technology aimed at deescalating situations with inmates. The new equipment is essentially taser gloves. These gloves will emit an electric shock similar to a taser, but not as high in voltage. That’s because the gloves are designed to only deescalate the situation, instead of being used as a use of high combat force. “About 65% of our staff are female, and I think it’s important that we provide them tools that help equalize,” said Brandi Garner, Oklahoma County Jail CEO [at press time].

Taser gloves! What can possibly go wrong?

“Basically I’ve got positives and negatives on a pad,” Justin Morris, Distributor for Compliant Technologies said. “It’s operating only through skin contact. So, people ask about pacemakers, defibrillators, the safety of that. We’re only grabbing enough motor units across the skin to stimulate the peripheral nervous system, just the sensory portion of that. So, we don’t cause any injury with our device.”

First of all, “Compliant Technology” is a touch too Philip K. Dick for my taste, and frankly, I don’t think I want my peripheral nervous system stimulated across my skin unless I decide to arrange the stimulation myself, if you know what I mean, and I think you do.

This is your democracy, America. Cherish it.