Unlock the Secret to Effortless Gym Flirting That Feels Totally Natural (No Awkward Moments!)

Think bookshops are the go-to spot for a meet-cute? Sure, flipping through pages has its charm—but for those of us who break a sweat, the gym might just be the ultimate playground for sparks to fly. Ever caught yourself noticing that cute smile between sets or wondering if your shared love for burpees could be more than just a coincidence? The gym isn’t just a place to sculpt muscles; it’s a stage where aligned values and shared routines create a secret language of attraction. Plus, there’s a whole cocktail of endorphins, flushed cheeks, and shortness of breath setting the scene for some serious chemistry—without even trying. But hey, flirting amidst the clanking weights and treadmills isn’t risk-free territory. With the right mix of respect, timing, and a little finesse, you can turn those sweaty encounters into something truly electrifying—minus the awkwardness. Ready to flex your flirting muscles? LEARN MORE

Bookshops might have a reputation as the classic meet-cute locale. But for fitness fans, the gym tops the list of real-life hotspots where sparks actually fly.

“Honestly, the gym is one of the most underrated places for gym-goers to flirt and meet someone,” according to relationship and confidence coach expert Sabrina Bendory. Any shared hobby makes for an easy entry point to connection.

The gym can be a particularly magical mutual interest because it signals aligned values—which is key to long-term relationship success. “It’s likely that people who meet at the gym value movement, sleep hygiene, managing stress, routine, and consistency,” says Shelby Terrell, LMSW, a sex and relationship therapist.

But exercising with someone doesn’t just signal compatibility—it can also build sexual chemistry. “Watching someone exercise creates a similar physical experience as when you’re aroused,” says Terrell. Whether you’re moving and grooving in salsa class, on the pickleball court, at a big box gym or CrossFit box, there’s bodily fluids, flushed cheeks, shortness of breath, she says. Plus, “exercising releases a whole bunch of endorphins and hormones (like testosterone), which can elevate mood and influence sex drive, potentially deepening intimacy and the feelings of connection with someone you’re training alongside or dating,” she says.

Of course, flirting at the gym isn’t without risks. “Your fitness space is most likely a space you go for stress relief and positivity,” says psychotherapist Kim Hertz, LCSW-R. “Flirting at the gym can breach the boundaries of this space and make it no longer feel safe and comfortable.” That doesn’t mean you have to swear off gym crushes altogether. By approaching the subject of your admiration with respect, patience, and care—you can flirt at the gym, without making things weird.

Meet the experts: Sabrina Bendory is a relationship and confidence coach, dating expert at Dating.com and author of You’re Overthinking It. Shelby Terrell, LMSW, is an intimacy coordinator and sex and relationship therapist. Kim Hertz LCSW-R, is a psychotherapist with NY Therapy Practice in New York City.

How to Flirt At The Gym

Where you sweat can be a delicate place to pursue a spicy connection. The tips ahead can help you make sure you’re honoring your fellow gym-goers—and also the sanctity of the space—when flirting with your gym crushes.

1. Pay attention to body language.

“There are definitely green lights and red lights when it comes to approaching someone at the gym—and reading them correctly is everything,” says Bendory.

Keep catching your crush’s eye in the mirror between sets? Notice a smile spread across their face when you pass? Feel like they keep making excuses to talk to you—for example, asking if you’re done with equipment you clearly just started using? Bendory says these may be low-key signs they’re down to flirt.

Just as important as clocking green lights, is honing in on hard reds. “If someone avoids eye contact, moves away when you’re near, or keeps their responses short and polite, they’re probably not interested or not available, and that’s your cue to move on,” says Bendory.

2. Avoid interrupting their workout.

When at the gym—whether it’s CrossFit box, power lifting gym, or yoga studio—most peeps are laser-focused on their form. Interrupting someone when they are mid-squat, sun salutation, or sprint, could throw off their workout and up the risk of injury. Despite what Grey’s Anatomy might have you believe a hospital visit is not a good first date.

“Timing goes a long way,” says Bendory. “Mid-deadlift is not the moment, but anytime they’re not in the zone, gasping for air, or clearly trying to focus could be,” she says. Think: Before class starts, between sets when the person is clearly resting, or at the water fountain may be, she says.

3. Make it friendly, not sexual.

Your sweat session might have your revved up, but your gym crush doesn’t need to know that. “One of the most common mistakes people make when flirting is hyper-sexualizing it,” says Terrell. In the gym, that typically translates to one-liners about a person’s body, butt, or flexibility—which can feel crude at best, and creepy at worst.

Instead of seeing flirting as a fast-track to freaking, Terrell suggests framing it as an opportunity to make someone smile. How can you make a bid for connection without making it physical? She suggests introducing yourself or asking about their training. Try:

• I’ve seen you here a few times, how is your training going?
• Are you training for anything in particular?
• Hey, I’ve seen you around and just wanted to say hi, I’m [you’re name]!

4. Take it slow.

Just like gaining muscle, building a vibe takes time. “Try not to rush it,” says Terrell. “You can build a connection over the course of a few different conversations.” This gives you space to figure out if you’re into more than just their physical appearance, while also creating room for something meaningful to unfold.

And remember: Friendship is one of the most common qualities people say they want in a long-term partner. “Go ahead and start that connection in the flirtation stage,” Terrell adds. “If it’s going to grow into something deeper, it will.”

5. But don’t beat around the bush.

If you’ve had a few great convos and know you want to take things beyond the gym, Terrell suggests being clear. Avoid offers to workout together, which is vague and could ultimately leave the other person confused.

Instead, Terrell suggests trying something like:

• Do you have interest in going on a date outside of the gym?
• Would you be open to hanging out outside of the gym sometime on a real date?
• I know we see each other here a lot, but I’d love to grab coffee or a drink sometime if you’re down.

6. Tread very, very carefully with trainers.

The gym might be your happy place, but it’s your fave instructor’s work place.

“It is their job to be friendly, encouraging, and engaged with you,” says Bendory. While it might be tempting to misread professional enthusiasm as personal interest, it’s important to remember that the fact they remember your name or compliment your form may just mean they are good at their job, she says.

If you’re genuinely interested in your coach or instructor, the key is to tread lightly and respectfully, says Bendory. “Don’t put them in an uncomfortable position by asking during the session or in front of a group,” she says. Instead, wait until after class or when they’re not actively working and offer a low pressure: “Hey, if you’re ever up for grabbing a coffee sometime, let me know.” This gives them an easy out if they’re not interested.

“If the vibe’s mutual and the timing is right, it could work, but if not, let it go gracefully,” she says.

7. Don’t sweat rejections.

“If you shoot your shot and it doesn’t land, try not spiral,” says Bendory. You never know what someone has going on in their life—or what their current relationship status, structure, or goals might be—just by looking at them, she says.

If someone isn’t interested, stay cool. Thank them for their honesty, give them emotional and physical space, and move on, Terrell says. Sure, rejection might sting in the moment, but far more painful is dating someone who is just lukewarm on you.

“You’re not for everyone, and that’s a good thing,” says Bendory. “The right person will notice, reciprocate, and meet you with the same energy.” So keep showing up, keep smiling, and don’t let one ‘no’ shake your confidence.

Gabrielle Kassel (she/her) is a sex and wellness journalist who writes at the intersection of queerness, sexual health, and pleasure. In addition to Women’s Health, her work has appeared in publications such as Shape, Cosmopolitan, Well+Good, Health, Self, Men’s Health, Greatist, and more! In her free time, Gabrielle can be found coaching CrossFit, reviewing pleasure products, hiking with her border collie, or recording episodes of the podcast she co-hosts called