Ever notice how men will talk about literally everything under the sun except how they feel about themselves? It’s like spilling feelings is off-limits, a secret club where “real men” just don’t check their self-worth at the door. As someone who’s spent years listening in therapy sessions and behind the keyboard breaking down wellness myths, I’ve seen firsthand how this silent struggle with self-esteem can shape—and shake—a man’s world. Why is it that hitting the gym or sharing a laugh seems easier than admitting those gut-level doubts? Chalk it up to toxic masculinity, social expectations, or simply the way we’re wired, but the reality is this: many men wrestle with low self-esteem in quiet desperation. And it’s not a small crowd—around 10% of guys in the U.S. face depression, a number that sneaks even higher if you ask me. Before diving into the behaviors that undermine a man’s self-worth, let’s take a quick look at what self-esteem really means through a man’s lens—because understanding the battlefield is the first step to winning it.
Self-Esteem and Men
One of the most common reasons men seek out therapy is to gain help with self-esteem. As a counselor, I can tell you it’s an issue that pops up frequently during sessions.
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